How To Show Up In A World That Just Keeps Spinning...
Did you know that our planet is currently spinning in space at a rate of 1,000 miles per hour?! I remember this fact from grade school but it never stops blowing my mind when I sit with it. Sometimes, with all that is going on in the world (politics, environmental changes, violence, interpersonal conflict, etc.), it’s almost like I can actually feel us spinning. This feeling can feel unsettling and even terrifying. How is one supposed to know what to do with that?!
Whether we are aware of it or not, most of us turn to behaviors that help us numb and avoid those terrifying feelings of uncertainty. We turn to other parts of our lives that help us forget so we don’t have to sit in that uncomfortable space. This is only human! Naturally, some of these behaviors can be adaptive or helpful while others might be maladaptive or harmful. In no particular order, here are some examples of such behaviors.
Spending time with family or friends
Watching TV
Scrolling through social media
Eating food
Not eating food
Exercising
Goal setting
Not watching or reading the news
Engaging in religious or spiritual practice
Drinking alcohol or using drugs
Playing video games
Going to work
Traveling
Engaging in sexual activities
As you can see, this list could go on and on. We all have our own system in place that helps us “hang on” in this spinning world of ours, but how do we know when a particular behavior or pattern is not in our best interest? How can we tell if we are putting our best foot forward to cope with something rather than just detach and avoid it?
This is not an easy question to answer, especially because our behaviors and patterns are learned and accepted throughout our lifetime. For example, it may be difficult to pin point whether you vegged out on the couch all day to avoid/numb out or because you wanted to relax.
Again, we are human, so it is not vital that we decipher these things all of the time. The point is that if we aren’t careful, we can end up living life on autopilot, leaving our values at the door. To live a life that is engaged and meaningful, we must play an active role in our daily decisions. The first step is self-awareness (i.e. bringing awareness to your here and now experience). Ask yourself questions like, “do I want to eat another slice of pizza because I’m hungry or because I’m feeling depressed?” Or, “did I decline an invitation to that party because I want alone time or because I am feeling critical of myself?”
By asking these questions, you invite yourself to be in the moment and spend time with decisions that are normally made without a thought. You probably wont always have the answer (this is normal!), but if you practice, bit-by-bit you will provide yourself opportunities that lead you toward a more rich and meaningful life.