Lost in Self-Doubt? Reflect on How Far You’ve Come!

Maybe it’s summertime, but I’ve found myself lacking motivation lately. When this happens, my brain tends to trigger feelings of insecurity and self-doubt. This past weekend I was traveling to New York and hoped to get some work done on the plane. I opened the notebook I’ve been using for the majority of 2019 and turned to my current “to do list.” But as I scanned the list I found myself feeling anxious and unmotivated by it. I was feeling much more inclined to avoid it and play a game on my phone instead. I decided to do neither and turned to the first page in my notebook, dated 1/22/19. I saw some scribbled notes about the then-state of my therapy practice and goals I hoped to achieve. It brought be back to when I first began writing this weekly blog; back when I was first trying to verbalize what Intraconnections Counseling was all about. 

As I flipped through the pages I came across a colorful diagram I drew (pictured below) displaying the process of becoming Intraconnected. I was then reminded of how stressed and anxious I felt trying to morph this idea into something I could feel confident sharing with the world. Writing those first few blog posts and creating my first video blog series was terrifying! I remember the thoughts of self-doubt spiraling and tempting me to stop trying and give up. 

How the heck did I overcome this? I look back on my experience and all I can say is that I just kept going. As much as I wanted to stop writing and talking in front of a camera, I didn’t. I wasn’t always happy with what I ended up posting (most of the time I wasn’t), but I decided that an imperfect post was better than none at all. 

Today as I write this blog, I can feel a difference in ease. Does writing and video taping myself still give me anxiety? Yes. But it is so much easier than it used to be! It is a reminder that we cannot expect ourselves to be awesome at something we’re new at. Making the decision to start something new (and sticking with it) requires time, patience, and courage.

When you find yourself feeling lost in self-doubt. Take some time to reflect on how far you’ve come. Though it might not always feel like it, you have already overcome so much! Remember that you are always evolving and changing, and that it is important be compassionate and patient with yourself as you progress.